In all the electronic and cartoon clutter that is Akihabara, these lip-shaped boxes jumped out from a store front display. The rainbow lettering says Pro Voice Tablets, and the small print claims that popping a few of the blueberry flavored pills before karaoke will unleash an astonishing new singing voice. Four of us got jostled standing on the crowded sidewalk examining the display for a while - what was in them? Could they possibly work? How? Was it a joke? A placebo? Our ticket to under-the-table export riches? The wonder tablets were for sale by the pouch of five, or by the box of ten pouches. Alex picked up a whole box. At a basement cafe nearby, we tried them out. The instructions say to let 3 - 5 tablets dissolve in your mouth without chewing. (They also suggest, with a disturbing vagueness, that if they "don't agree with your body," you should stop taking them immediately.)
We popped one each and waited while they dissolved. The size and taste were like a cross between Sweet Tarts and baby aspirin. Alex had the leftover fifth pill. He said, "I think it's burning a hole in my tongue." We all la-ed and oo-ed, but weren't convinced of any vocal changes. Later in the night, wine stung the spots on our tongues where we'd each let the tablets dissolve.
Verdict: uncertain. Swallowing the recommended dose might make you sing better, but it also might corrode your tongue. Small price to pay for karaoke fame?
2 comments:
it's a little-known fact, but the top layer of skin on your tongue is the #1 enemy of karaoke.
I don't know if those suckers make you sing better, but with the pain they put you through, maybe you can be a better song writer.
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