When life gives you lemon-scented toilet paper

 

The smell of lemon means one of two things: a refreshing drink or a toxic cleaning product. And there are places where neither of these things should ever go.  

It happens that I wasn't the one who bought this pack, but I've done the same thing. Recently, and in bulk. In this land where celery is sold by the individual rib and one styrofoam tray of ground beef is just about enough to make two meatballs, I managed to pick up an eight-pack of floral-soaked rolls. Toilet paper is just about the only thing that is actually sold more often in big economy packages than in scanty micropacks. I think the wrapper boasted of 360 meters of smelly paper.

I don't know why I hate scented toilet paper so much. Beyond the cloying smell and the idea of blatant chemicals where I don't want them, that is. I guess that's enough reason. But I understand some people do like it. I mean, I don't understand why they like it, but I hear that they do. So whatever your preference, let this be a warning. Take a second at the store to give a closer look to any cute little drawings of flowers or fruit on your toilet paper, and make sure it passes the sniff test.

Hey, I put some marathon music in your bananas

I was walking around Aoyama one sunny day when I stumbled on a Tokyo Marathon pop-up shop. They were selling bright lime green and pink running gear and giving a presentation on how to do your hair and make-up for long runs. (Did you know there's a "golden point" where your ponytail should be?)
The woman running the thing offered me some mineral water and a sports banana. Sports banana? Yes, they're launching a banana at the marathon that's smaller than usual and higher in citric acid (Japan loves citric acid! Why?), making it the perfect banana for sports. (Not like those other bananas, that are a real pain to carry.) Between you and me, it kind of sounds like they found a new way to sell runtier bananas for the same price as bigger ones. But still, kind of interesting from a marketing standpoint. And then she dropped that oh, by the way, they're getting the bananas ready for the marathon by blaring a Japanese pop song throughout the enormous ripening facility for a week. Check out the whole story on Japan Pulse. It's bananas!
This is the song.
It's kind of the Eye of the Tiger of Japanese pop music.

Get out the way

I hate to generalize, but these posters have left me no choice. Maybe if I hadn't been dragging an overstuffed wheelie bag from the airport, up and down the steps of the train system the first time I saw them.

I read pictures slowly. Looking at the left panel, the next panel my brain (or was it my aching back?) drew was of the guy helping the woman with her bag. Wrong! It's the woman getting her stuff out of the way.
You do see a lot more people dragging wheeled bags here than elsewhere - they seem to be the (smart) accessory of choice for people on big shopping sprees or... actually, I don't know what everyone is doing with suitcases all the time. I understand the cosplay kids use them to carry their gear around. This picture seems to be a business traveler, though. (Projecting?)

 Here's another Clueless Cathy bringing the works to a halt with her bag. Jerk!
Japan has an image of being polite to a fault, and New York of being hard and heartless. But I've seen a hell of a lot more people helping each other lug bags and baby carriages up the steps in NY than in Tokyo.
How about that for a poster?

Another piece of my heart-shaped pizza

I should send a valentine to Papa John's PR team. They bought a hashtag on Twitter about their heart-shaped pizza. That sent me to my old post about Japan's much cuter version. Next thing I knew, I was clicking through delivery options on the Dominos website, scheduling a pizza of love for two hours later. By the time it arrived, Tokyo was getting a surprise snowstorm. Jim trudged home from work in it and got home wet and freezing. A hot novelty pizza went over better than any fussy homemade candy could have. I think his exact words were, "This is way better than chocolate!"
Hear that, Hallmark?